Hopelessly devoted

It's official: Ryan Gosling is my new boyfriend. It doesn't matter that he's younger than me. Or Canadian. He will be mine. Now, for years, I couldn't stand him -- dude, if you've ever seen Murder by Numbers, you know two things: Ryan Gosling is totally convincing as a psychopath and Sandra Bullock cannot play tough to save her life. (You may also know that you're wasting far too much of your life watching bad movies, but bygones.) After he effectively made my skin crawl, I dismissed him entirely. Until, somehow, the Notebook sucked me in. Fucking Encore! Damn channel shows that movie 800 times a day, and damned if I don't have to watch it every fucking time. I know it's sappy drivel, but I can't help myself. So I rented the United States of Leland, just so I could get back to the comforting feeling of "Ryan Gosling is not hot, he's a crazy mofo," but alas, he was all cute and misunderstood and, well, fucking crazy. Somehow, this all led to me watching the Slaughter Rule, which was actually a good little independent film, but that's neither here nor there because it had The Shot. You know, the kill shot. The one where you just know your fate is cemented because you have just seen heaven and it is Ryan Gosling's washboard abs. Sonofabitch.